Teaching Teen Girls: 5 Signs A Guy Is Only Interested in Sex
July 28, 2009
By guest blogger Vanessa Van Petten who is the teen author of the parenting book “You’re Grounded!” She writes a parenting blog along with 12 other teen writers from the kid’s perspective to help parents. Her work as a young family peacemaker have been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Teen Vogue, Fox 5, CBS 4 and much more! http://www.RadicalParenting.com
How do parents teach their teen daughter that they have to learn whether or not a guy is only interested in sex? It is important dating lesson, one that teens are learning earlier and earlier.
Here are a few tips I like to give teen girls when they start thinking about boys and dating:
1) Actions Speak Louder Than Words
Boys can be smooth talkers. One thing I try to impress upon girls (even on my 23 year-old friends) is that girls read way more into language than boys. Some boys—not all, might stretch the truth if it means they will get to hook-up with you. That is why listening to actions, is almost more important than listening to words. Does he say he cannot wait to see you, but forgets to call? Does he say that he does not care if you hook-up, but then is very physical when you see each other?
2) Learn to Read Faces
Most people actually display most of their emotions on their faces. Teen boys especially are not very good at hiding their true emotions. This can be a great way to see if he is telling the truth and how he really feels. Look at his face the instant you say ‘no’ to doing something you are uncomfortable with. Does he look sad, scared, embarrassed or worried? These are all OK emotions. If he looks angry, resentful, bored or annoyed this is not a good sign.
3) How Do His Friends Treat You
Guys always talk to their guys about sex and you. I find that if you meet his friends and they have heard about you, talk to you and take an interest in you, your guy probably shared his idea that he likes you more than just for sex. If they ignore you, make lewd comments or snicker when you come in, you might want to have a talk with one of them or your guy for what they know.
4) What Does He Remember and Talk About
If a guy remembers things about what you talk about, he is actually interested in what you have to say, not just what you have to ‘put-out.’ If he seems to take an interest in you and talks about things other than sex, you are probably with a boy who actually cares about you and not just the sex.
5) When Do You Interact
This one can be tricky, because sometimes teen boys can only interact when parents are asleep or in certain time frames. Yet, teen girls need to learn to pay attention to the interaction schedules. Are boys only calling when it is late at night or when they want to get together? Do teen boys want to go to parties with you, but not dates or spend any alone time unless you are hooking up? This can be a sign that they only want a sexual interaction.
I think these signs are important to talk to your teen daughters about, but also remember to explain to them that teen boys are also just as nervous and might be acting strange or weird because they are uncomfortable. The best policy is always to be as open and honest with your feelings and in your relationships.
By: Vanessa Van Petten is the teen author of the parenting book “You’re Grounded!” She writes a parenting blog along with 12 other teen writers from the kid’s perspective to help parents. Her work as a young family peacemaker have been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Teen Vogue, Fox 5, CBS 4 and much more! http://www.RadicalParenting.com